Even though I’m not a Letterman fan, David Letterman pretty well has it figured out
LETTERMAN’S TOP 10 REASONS TO VOTE DEMOCRAT
#10. I vote Democrat because I love the fact that I can
now marry whatever I want. I’ve decided to marry my
#9. I vote
Democrat because I believe oil companies’
profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are
obscene, but the government taxing the same gallon at 15% isn’t.
#8. I vote Democrat because I believe
the government will do a better job of
spending the money I earn than I would.
#7. I vote
Democrat because Freedom of Speech is fine as long as nobody is
offended by it.
#6. I vote Democrat because
I’m way too irresponsible to own a gun, and I know that my local
police are all I need to protect me from murderers and thieves. I am
also thankful that we have a 911 service that get police to your home
in order to identify your body after a home invasion.
#5. I vote Democrat because I’m not
concerned about millions of babies being
aborted so long as we keep all death
row inmates alive and comfy.
#4. I vote Democrat because I think
illegal aliens have a right to free health
care, education, and Social Security benefits,
and we should take away Social Security from
those who paid into it.
I vote Democrat because I believe that businesses should not be allowed
to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the
rest away to the government for redistribution as the Democrat Party
#2. I vote Democrat because I believe liberal judges need to rewrite the
Constitution every few days to suit fringe kooks who would never get
their agendas past the voters.
#1 reason I vote Democrat is because I think it’s better to
pay $billions$ for oil to people who hate us, but not drill our own because it might
upset some endangered beetle, gopher or fish here in America. We don’t
care about the beetles, gophers or fish in those other countries.
Thank you and have a great day!